brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
