I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
