Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
