hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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