We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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