Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
