direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
either way he was missing a nipple.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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