i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
