I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
