yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize