Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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