I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Randomize
