What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
