Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
