I just made out with a guy for $7.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Is Oprah even human
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
