i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
