i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
