At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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