Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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