My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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