ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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