im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
and i looked up. we had an audience...
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
