she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
