i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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