Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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