If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
