And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
