By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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