if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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