so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Randomize
