Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize