absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You're completely useless in the revolution.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
there was a trapeze. enough said
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
sarcasm needs its own font
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
