i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
it's great music for shaving your balls
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
