and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize
