don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
