Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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