She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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