I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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