She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
