Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
