Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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