You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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