Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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