Jerry, you need to find god
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
