Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
My dick has a subreddit
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Randomize
