two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
