Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
