I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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