I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
This baby is an asshole
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
