why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
