Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You made out with two different species that night
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
