I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
